Stefanie Kiser E-book: “Wished: Toddler’s Private Assistant”. Cowl design by Jillian Rahn/Sourcebooks.
Courtesy: Stefanie Kiser
Stephanie Kiser got here to New York Metropolis in 2014 as a brand new faculty graduate, hoping to grow to be a screenwriter. As a substitute, she spent the subsequent seven years as a nanny for rich households.
Kiser’s new memoir, “Wished: Toddler’s Private Assistant: How Nannying for the 1% Taught Me in regards to the Myths of Equality, Motherhood, and Upward Mobility in America,” particulars her sudden profession detour.
Her seven years as a nanny noticed her escorting one shopper’s daughter to $500-per-lesson literacy tutors on the Higher East Facet, driving Porsches and Mercedes for on a regular basis errands and sheltering in place at a household’s house within the Hamptons throughout the Covid-19 pandemic. Her shoppers included households with dynastic wealth in addition to these with high-paying jobs akin to docs and attorneys.
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In Kiser’s first nannying job, she was paid $20 an hour, way over the $14 an hour she estimates she would have made as a manufacturing assistant beneath a short-term contract. Plus, she typically ended up working further hours.
“It often ended up being like $1,000 per week with every little thing that I used to be doing,” Kiser stated.
That first job opened doorways for higher-paid positions by nanny businesses. In Kiser’s last 12 months as a nanny throughout the pandemic, she estimates she took house about $110,000.
“Despite the fact that I had the least revered job of my mates, I undoubtedly was making essentially the most,” stated Kiser, who’s now 32 and works at an ad-tech firm in New York Metropolis.
CNBC spoke with Kiser about a few of the monetary classes she discovered throughout her time as a nanny, and why she finally left the function.
(This interview has been edited and condensed for readability).
No prospects for job progress: ‘I used to be very stationary’
Scarlett Johansson on Location for “The Nanny Diaries” on Could 1, 2006 at Higher East Facet in New York Metropolis, New York, United States.
James Devaney | Wireimage | Getty Pictures
Ana Teresa Solá: After I first noticed this e-book, I considered “The Nanny Diaries,” a novel revealed within the early 2000s after which tailored right into a film. What made you determine to show your story right into a memoir as an alternative of a novel?
Stephanie Kiser: I learn “The Nanny Diaries” once I began my first job. It undoubtedly hit house on the time, however I did really feel prefer it was type of a satire. I did not need to villainize the wealthy or the poor as a result of I’ve individuals I really like very dearly on each side.
The intention of my e-book was to make a social commentary. It was my hope that I might bridge this understanding a bit between the 2 sides as a result of there’s this thought that poor individuals simply aren’t working exhausting sufficient and wealthy individuals are simply inherently dangerous.
I do not assume that is essentially true, however I believe that people who find themselves rich, who’re using these individuals who actually need these jobs, they do have privilege and a chance to both make somebody’s life higher or worse.
A contract as a nanny is necessary as a result of there isn’t any HR.
ATS: You point out that you could possibly not afford to work in an expert job in New York as a result of the pay was a lot decrease than you have been making as a nanny. Did you are feeling trapped?
SK: When my final boss learn this e-book, she felt unhappy and was like, ‘I did not notice you have been so depressing doing the job.’ I stated, ‘No, I wasn’t depressing doing the job. I cherished your youngsters a lot, however this was not the job I wished.’
I did really feel trapped. I felt like there’s nothing else I might presumably do, and it acquired a bit of bit worse as time went on.
All my mates have been rising in these jobs they usually have been getting extra expertise of their resume, and I wasn’t. I used to be very stationary on this place.
It wasn’t a superb feeling to really feel like there’s nothing else I might presumably do. Now I’ve a distinct job and that is the primary 12 months that I am incomes greater than I did nannying, which is nice, however the first couple of years after nannying have been undoubtedly actually exhausting financially, making that shift.
‘There isn’t any HR … the contract is actually all you’ve gotten’
ATS: A household supplied you a wage of $125,000, plus full well being and dental, a month-to-month metro card and an annual bonus. However you went with a distinct household for much less pay. You talked about you have been ready on a contract. Why is that so necessary within the enterprise?
SK: A contract as a nanny is necessary as a result of there isn’t any human assets; there isn’t any legal guidelines defending you. Your employers are absolutely answerable for every little thing they usually decide every little thing. [New York State does have a “Domestic Workers Bill of Rights” with a few protections.]
At a daily job, you will be like, ‘I labored 60 hours already this week, and I am not going to work extra.’ You’ll be able to’t do this right here [with a nanny position.]
The contract is actually all you’ve gotten, and to not get the contract was actually worrisome. Your entire life was going to be a nanny for this household. And I used to be coming off of a job the place that had been actually tough, feeling like I wasn’t actually an individual, and I did not need to settle for a job the place that was the case once more.
Stefanie Kiser E-book: “Wished: Toddler’s Private Assistant”. Cowl design by Jillian Rahn/Sourcebooks.
Courtesy: Stefanie Kiser
ATS: Are you able to describe the variations between an au pair and a nanny?
SK: An au pair is allowed to work a sure variety of hours, like as much as 30 hours per week or 40 hours per week, however there’s a clear boundary as a result of they typically work for an company. The company that has despatched them has instructed you very clearly they can’t work greater than this.
They get a really small stipend, however they do get particular lodging, perhaps they’ve their very own room. They’ve all their meals paid for, transportation. An au pair has extra issues in place to be sure that they are not taken benefit of. Nannies typically do not have these protections.
Nannies who come from businesses are barely extra protected and people are sometimes those who get contracts. However these are the most effective of the most effective nannies; these are profession nannies who’ve been doing this for 50 years; they’ve raised so many youngsters they usually have superb references. Or it is a younger nanny that simply acquired right here after graduating from a fantastic college and has like 10 abilities that they’re able to supply. So this can be a luxurious, truthfully.
ATS: You additionally describe the uncertainty related to this job. It looks like nannying work can have a low barrier to entry, with wage progress potential, however then there are all these different dangers.
SK: I’ve identified nannies who’ve gotten pregnant they usually inform their boss. There isn’t any, ‘We will pay you three months maternity.’ there isn’t any, ‘We’re gonna allow you to go away on month eight so you possibly can relaxation.’ There’s none of that.
You’ll be able to by no means actually really feel secure within the job. When you’ve got a medical emergency, if something goes unsuitable — I am positive there’s exceptions, however for essentially the most half, you are type of simply out of luck. It’s a actually dangerous profession in that sense.
‘That is how you understand they’re rich’
ATS: In response to the Pew Analysis Middle, about 47% of childless adults beneath 50 in 2023 stated they’re unlikely to ever have youngsters. What would that imply for nannies?
SK: I’m wondering if that applies to the type of those who I am writing about. I’m wondering if for them this can be a decline we’ll see or in the event that they’re type of outliers.
If it’s the case, I believe it is a actually significant issue. There are lots of people in New York who come right here they usually want one thing to get by, who babysit, perhaps it is their after work job and that is how they do it. Or there’s individuals who do not have papers which can be actually restricted in what they’ll do, and numerous instances, housekeeping and nannying is the one choice.
ATS: On the finish of the e-book, you write that you simply obtained a proposal as a private assistant for a CEO with a $90,000 wage and advantages. Was that start line under what you had been incomes as a nanny on the time?
SK: For positive. As a nanny, I had made $110,000 … So it was a big lower.
I needed to work in a short time and really exhausting to get promoted. I used to be a private assistant and I used to be an govt assistant, I modified firms final July and I turned a senior assistant, and that was the function the place I lastly made greater than I did nannying. And I do not assume I might have achieved this, made this transition, if my scholar mortgage funds weren’t paused due to Covid.
ATS: You write in your e-book that some households sign their wealth by having many youngsters. I am curious to listen to extra about that.
SK: I take into consideration the place I used to be born and the place I got here from, and anytime there was a household that had like 5 – 6 youngsters, it was type of like, ‘Nicely that is sensible, as a result of they weren’t rich.’ And then you definately come to New York and also you see somebody on Park Avenue that has 5 – 6 youngsters, and it is like, ‘That is how you understand they’re rich.’
Right here, should you do have three youngsters, you begin sending them to preschool at $40,000 a 12 months, after which they’ll these elite colleges from kindergarten to twelfth grade which can be $60,000 a 12 months, and then you definately’re sending them to Harvard for 4 years.
And it is not even simply the education, it is more often than not you are sending three youngsters to this faculty, then you definately’re using a full-time nanny after they’ve non-public guitar classes.
ATS: What would you inform ladies of their 20s who’re within the footwear you have been in just a few years in the past?
SK: Do issues in parallel. I do not assume I’d have been joyful if I had achieved simply the nannying. I could not have survived on simply writing, however I believe that by doing this in parallel, issues turned out precisely how they have been speculated to be for me.
Nannying was so necessary for me as a result of not solely was I in a position to make cash to dwell, but it surely allowed me to get a basis. After I moved to New York, I had nothing. Now I’ve a totally furnished residence, issues that you want to be a totally functioning grownup. I’ve a canine, I can deal with him and I’ve a automobile. These are issues that I could not have achieved with out being a nanny.
